A Mother's Pride
Yesterday, Regis pointed out that the song "Stars Are Blind,'' which I thought was by Gwen Steffani was, in reality, by Paris Hilton--who actually sounds good on it.
But the video! Lulu and I watched it on the internet and we couldn't stop giggling.
Paris--in a bikini, then a white dress, then a one-piece that fleetingly bared her nipple--made out with a barechested hunk, writhing and pouting like a bad lap dancer.
And then she dry-humped a palm tree.
Lulu couldn't comprehend it.
"Why is she doing that to the tree?'' she asked. "She's like, 'Tree, I love you. And the tree is like, 'I love YOU, Paris Hilton.'''
When Paris drove off in a convertible at the end, Lulu added more dialogue: "I don't like my boyfriend anymore, I'm going back to see that tree.''
And then, completely unaware of her budding genius as a critic, she came up with the best line of all: "If that tree had feelings, it would be sad.''